Monday, December 15, 2014

aaaaand I'm STILL single

I always try to avoid these posts. I did it once before and I deleted it after I swore to not only you, but to myself I would keep it.. I love to talk about myself when there is something good to say. Like, I got a raise, or, someone came to visit me. You know, something like that. When it comes to my feelings, or the fact that I'm single I shut down.

I stripped myself for you before and talked about my past a little in another post and I didn't get as much backlash as I thought I would. I get a lot of e-mails telling me that I need to open up more or that I need to tone it down. Well, fuck off please (:

'Tiss the season for:

  • family
  • couples to do cute things
  • kissing under the mistletoe
  • caroling
  • late night cuddles (or whatever your into) by a lit fire
Last year I wanted to do a Christmas card because I thought it would be funny to flaunt that I was single and that it was okay for a single girl to send a Christmas card of my pretty self. I didn't get them printed in time so I didn't get to share them. So, this year I told myself I would do it. But, the closer that it gets to Christmas I grow more and more aware that I am going to die alone. I know, far fetched and a little off track...Hear me out, I love being in love. I love love. I want that again. So, what would you do if you opened up a Christmas card and it was of me with a bottle of'd laugh right? I mean it's hysterical, but just remember, you're laughing at my pain and will go to hell for that <3

I'll be honest...again...I love my family with all of my heart and soul. But, I'm the only single kid. Like seriously I have no one that I can call real quick and ask to pretend they are my boyfriend while I awkwardly eat food with them and their perfect mini families. And if your mind went to Bubba then you're an idiot...I can't pretend to date him my family isn't stooopid. But how sad is that? The only single kid and I have to make someone PRETEND to date me. Like, they don't even want to date me in real life I have to like coax them with promised food or something.

Last week me and my roommate watched "the Holiday" you know the one with sexy Jude Law, and Cameron Diaz? It was such a cute movie and I made it through without crying because thanks to my roommate being single also, we just laughed instead of crying. So, then on Friday night I got really drunk by myself and was like "I wanna watch a Christmas movie. And I want to watch 'the Holiday' because I'm a fucking idiot and think all things bad are good ideas" Yeah, I cried THE WHOLE FUCKING MOVIE. If you haven't seen it, hurry and watch it...if you are not dying alone you will love it. If you are single and not happy about that then I suggest you probably don't watch it A. alone and B. drunk. <--You're welcome. If you have seen it then you know who I relate to..Iris, who is played by the beautiful Kate Winslet. I too am in love with someone and I know he knows it. It's almost been a year of this and I push him to the side to try and move on and then somehow I just pretend that I didn't do that and then call him. It's pathetic and it makes us strong girls look fuckin weak. And my mom would tan my hide if she knew I was prancing around a boy waiting for him to say "Annie, I'm a fool. I love you." and then boom we live happily ever after...ha ha because that's how it works right all you non single people??

I fear I will never move on from him. He'd probably appreciate that. Except I can't. So, here I stand...or prance....and there I will stay. I used to think it was just lust because this guy is like oober sexy and scraggly sometimes and absolutely perfect so I mean any girl would lust after him. But, we spend a decent-ish amount of time together. and when we are not together we are using other means of communication and I just keep falling deeper and deeper...Fuck me right?

So, maybe I'll still send out that Christmas card. And maybe you will laugh at my single lady pain. But, I will make it fucking worth it. Funny caption...and I'll be very drunk.

From, me to....your perfect family. Merry fucking Christmas, Bitches.

Thursday, December 11, 2014

Christmas (this is for you, Kari)

So this one time I was working a grave and had this thought..."I'm gonna blog". Once I got on here I had literally NOTHING to blog about...I always have something to say..So, I snapped a friend and asked for inspiration....and this is what she gave me to work with..Christmas. HAHA

Last time I blogged about Christmas I was drunk and ranting about all the Ba-Humbugs I feel every year..Brace yourself, it's back ha ha.

*All things to hate about Christmas:

  • Crowded Stores
  • Mean people
  • Greedy people
  • Crying kids
  • Santa
  • Long Lines
  • Snow
  • Cold
  • People fight more
  • No ones ever pleased
  • You get fat
  • You have to work on Christmas
All of those reasons would make anyone a Ba-Humbug. Dwelling on things that are negative will not make your Christmas any better. But it might make it worse. So, since making that list didn't bring the Christmas spirit into me I will write a list of.....

*All things to LOVE about Christmas:
  • Awesome Sales
  • Presents
  • Singing/Caroling
  • Yummy food selections
  • Family
  • Holiday Booze
  • Desserts
  • Christmas lights
  • Christmas Tree
  • My kids
  • Crying kids (because even though it's annoying I still laugh)
  • Sledding
  • Sleeping in
  • Holiday pay
  • My grandma's Christmas party
  • Games
So, that brought out some Christmas cheer inside of me. Notice how the second list has more shiz? Anyway, It's really easy to look at stuff that would teeter on the negative side and make it that much easier to fill your soul with holiday hate..I guess I am just used to not liking the holidays because I literally HATE snow. I hate being cold and I think Santa is a giant white bearded pervert. However, since he's not real (i hope your parents told you) Christmas is for family and obviously Jesus the Christ. 

Happy Holidays Bitches
<3 Annie

P.s. Kari, thank you for inspiring me to inspire others. I love you.

Sunday, December 7, 2014

Momma's Girl

All of us have a preferred (or go to) parent, mine is my mother. I've always been a "momma's girl" but in recent years she's been my number 1! Anything I need she's right there. While she plays the "fun mom" most of the time she can switch to the "mom mom card" in the same second REAL fast which helps balance our relationship and remind me that she's still my mom and will have no problem telling me when I am just full of shit.

My mom asked me earlier this year if I wanted to save some money and go with her back home (back home=Australia) with her. Of course I said yes. Then I sat down for my finances and then realized I couldn't afford it. Instead I bought a car. So, now my mom is going without me and for 4 months. That's 17 weeks...121 days....that's a long time to be away from your best friend.

I always joke that my mom is my best friend because I have no friends myself ha ha. Except I do. I have 2 very best friends and then I have my regular friends that all rank the same. My friends are a part of my family ( not literally), we all would do anything for each other no matter what and to be honest, my mom is fucking cool so I don't exactly care who makes fun of me for calling my mom daily to "hang out".

I've tried to not freak out that she leaves tomorrow but I have been crying everyday over it. It's like I'm 6 all over again and she's going to be getting on a flight and leaving for a few weeks. Only now that I'm grown up she can go for a lot longer than that. But I wish she wouldn't. 17 weeks is going to be a damn long time, and she's going to miss all of my funny jokes and stories. But, she is going to have so much fun with her sisters and in the sun and that's kind of all that matters. Since I was born she has dedicated so much of her life to me, her time, her money, her love, her support, her sympathy, her understanding and her awesome hugs that make me wanna cry thinking about. So, if she can do all of that for me I SUPPOSE I could do this ONE thing for her <3

Saturday, November 29, 2014

Tara & Brett

After Halloween my cousin Tara and her boyfriend Brett came to Utah from Australia to visit. It was super eventful for them this go around which was really cool. Due to the fact that I super love working 2 full time jobs meant that I only saw them a small fraction of their stay. They spent most of their time at Laura's house and did lots of fun things. 

For the time that I did see them this is what we did...because this is my blog and I know you wanna know everything about my life. Or you wouldn't be here. haha They paid for a number of my family to go to Angies for dinner where we cleaned out the sink and super overate. If you have never been to angies cleaning the sink is like their signature thing. they literally give you a sink and fill it with ice cream and whatever toppings you want and if you finish the sink they take your picture and post it to social media. Of course. It's a super ton of ice cream and having 10 of us made it not so overwhelming. 

Last year when they came I was in the middle of my 'eat all the Betos' phase, so, they ate there with me and actually liked it. We had a little bit of extra time left before I took them down to my sisters house in Roy so they asked for tacos. Now, I don't really eat Betos much anymore so instead we went to Taco Time and they LOVED it!! The little things that I take for granted were things that they were so thankful for. Lower prices, good food, family. 

I was so sad when they had to leave. They are probably my favorite couple ever! Everything is exciting, they love to try new things, they make time for everyone that they are visiting...and we sing 'Dick in a Box' and 'Creep' (((:

Tara, if you are reading this, just know that I love you so much and I have been so blessed to have finally met you! Brett is just an added bonus!! You guys are so full of life and I cannot wait to see you again!!!

<3 <3

Friday, October 24, 2014

Rama & Gary finally come to America!!

So, as you know, my mom is from Australia. So, all of her side of the family is scattered over there. Within just two short years I was able to meet 2 cousins 2 aunts and 1 uncle (: I have only known of one Aunt my whole life until just a few years ago when my mom’s dad passed away and then BAM in comes like 100 more family members..(literally). And from then on I have met my family one person at a time.

This year I had the pleasure to meet my aunt Rama and uncle Gary. They are such great company! They had been in town for about 2 days maybe and I got to take them bar hopping in logan. Which isn’t super great because logan is so small; but they were troopers and still had fun. *side note: I drank 4 AMF’s and a Big Dog and was still standing at midnight* In about two weeks I will get to see my cousin and her boyfriend for the second time. WOOT!!

Today is Gary and Rama’s last night in Utah (I think they’re traveling more). So, my family is having a dinner party in their honor to say “Sayonara”. I thought for sure I was going to miss it due to being a workaholic, but at the last second my boss said she’d single staff for the day. So, thank you Jae you’re a lifesaver!!! I drove down with my mom, Raigen and Serina to my sisters house in Roy so we could start cooking the food and getting ready for the night. This part of the day is boring so let’s just skip to the part where everyone started showing up….shall we??

So, we had a really good turnout, Minus Carrie. Baby Caden was sick. ): I feel like there is always at least one of us that cannot make it to functions. Usually that person is me. so, that was weird. Other than that pretty much everyone was there. All of the kids had fun watching Cone Heads, Adventure Time, and Cloudy 2 with Matt (ha ha). It was just a bunch of crazy people running around the house like chickens with their heads cut off like every family gathering. That’s the perks of having 6 kids…comes with a lot more grandkids..Dinner was great! My mom made Polynesian food and we all soaked up the last bit of company we could with Rama and Gary.

 When I took Gary and Rama to the bar, they only drank Bourbon and Coke. So, at this party, they already had an open bottle of Bourbon but decided to go to the liquor store and buy another bottle. Because, you know, just in case. They came back and Gary pulls out 2 glasses and I just figured that he was going to serve Rama and himself..duh. No, he pours about a shot in this half size glass and says “Annie, do you think this will be enough”? Still not reading much into it I say “sure”? Then, he pours some coke in the cup and hands the cup to me and says “cheers” and then clinks my glass. Because I have a way of making everything weird I looked down and said “thanks, I really was thirsty too”. Ba ha ha ha. Towards the end of the night we had almost finished the already opened bottle and Gary turns to Rama and says “yeah, I thought I would be good, but this one is drinking me under the table”. Which, made my head grow a little big. Ha ha I don’t need to know I can drink anyone under the table, especially a grown man!  

Thinking that this party was the last time that I would see them before they left I followed them around like a lost shadow. Then, my mom says that she’s thinking about going down again the next day to say goodbye. Remember, we live all the way in Hyrum. I looked at my schedule on my phone and saw that, welp, that I had the day off. WOOT. So, my mom and I went down the next day and said our final goodbyes. )’: 

*All of the photos with the whole family are unfortunately NOT on my phone. So, perhaps if i stumble upon one I like then I will post it to here 

Monday, October 6, 2014

pinterest shminterest

You know when you wake up at like 3 a.m. and you're fucking hungry so you get on Pinterest and start looking at desserts? Me too. So, whilst (if you know Chandler Bing that's funny) I was on Pinterest's dessert section I found a recipe for Caramel Cheesecake Apple Dip. I know, my mouth watered too. So, as pathetic as this sounds, I got dressed and went to Wal-Mart and bought the shiz needed to make this holy treat. (at 3 a.m.)

Looks good, huh?

I knew I was on the right track when I pulled it out of the fridge after chilling and it had set up like it was supposed to. SCORE

I got a little bit impatient when I put the second layer on so I shoved it in the freezer for 30 min. Yeah, it was supposed to be in the fridge for up to 2 hours. I'm not a patient person Also, I'm not a baker. Just a cook, and a damn good one at that.

Anyway, so, here is the finished project..mmmhm yeah my first Pinterest experience and it wasn't a fail WOOT WOOT!! HIGH FIVE!!

Saturday, September 27, 2014


Today my family and I went to Lagoon. I haven't been since last year when i went for work. So, thank you Beth for working for Sara Lee so that I could go to Lagoon (: 

When we first walked into the park there was a....well...this. My dad walked behind and just made this face. No one knew he was standing behind it until little raigen says "look at grandpa!!" We died.

I told my mom i'd pay her $5 if she walked through and got, leave it to her to ONLY get the bottom half of her wet. Smartie. 

While everyone was looking for the pavilion for the party, my dad and I snuck away to start our fun. we looked at the rocket, looked at each other and with no words just ran (yes, we ran) to the non existent line. That's the greatest thing about going to lagoon on a rainy day...there are NO LINES!! P.S. do you like how my dad isn't smiling?? haha he looks so nervous.

Those are my legs. (: 

We were in the middle of a conversation and it just took off. Ha ha, we almost shit our pants. My dad is literally the best lagoon buddy E.V.E.R!!!

Last Ride.

This is really funny for one reason. There is this guy that works on my dad's route and his name is Doug. Or, if you ask my dad he MIGHT say, Dipshit Doug, Dumbass Doug whatever Doug. He is super useless. So, if this isn't funny to you, you need a sense of humor!

Then, we all found our way to the Bat. No one likes the Bat but the kids. My mom took one look at it and said, Oh, wow. Hmm...maybe I would like that? is it fast? We all said no. (don't trust your kids duh)

Okay, so after convincing my mom that this is the easiest ride for her she decided to get on. While we were getting strapped in she says "Anne, if you are lying to me i'm gonna beat you". and my response.."mom, would I ever lie to you"? Half the time spent on the ride she didn't make a peep ha ha she was so concerned about falling out of the seat to scream. But, after 15 something years I finally got her to go on a ride with me (((:

My mom is seriously my best friend!

For about 5 minutes BrynLeigh asked us to ride bumper cars and until we were in line she reminded us that was what we were doing. I love her so very much!!!

Despite the weather we had such a blast and the kids were really good and cooperative. Each got to go on a ride they wanted and it was super fun!! <3

Saturday, August 2, 2014

Shut up Meg

You know how in family guy they hate meg? Well, there's a real life meg and I hate her.

•she cut my hair with a knife in front of a customer
•she threw a bottle of mustard on my shoe (vans) and ruined them. 
•she wears BRIGHT pink lipstick 
•she is nosy as fuuuuck
•she starts rumors
•she was homeschooled (homeschool kids are freaks)

That's really all my post is is just that I hate her SO SO SOOOO much!! There is nothing like-able about her. Her voice is so whiny too. I just hate her. The End.

& your a fart smeller Meg


I have been avoiding this post. This post is so personal to me and really only a few people will feel my emotion as they remember my dog, Sunny.

On June 12, 2013, I lost my best friend. I understand that some don't think of dogs as 'part of the family' but, sunny was like my little brother. Here's a few things I loved most about him.

  • He ate bee's
  • He ate rocks
  • He was scared of cats (srsly)
  • He was the best cuddler
  • He loved babies
  • He liked to pretend he was smaller than he actually was
  • He LOVED the chickens...thought he was one
  • He was best friends with my dad
  • He never failed to to greet you upon coming home
  • He had a spot on his tongue (:
This unfortunate day came a little unexpected and at the worst time. My mom was out of the country, my dad was working his late night, the girls (raigen & serina) were out of town and I wasn't ready to give up my puppy. I got woken up by my older brother Michael, asking me to come and see Sunny. I rolled off the couch and expected to find something he had gotten into or if he was doing something funny (like always) and he was having the hardest time standing up his legs were shaking and if everyone remembers the size of Sunny, well, it looked like there was another him inside his belly. I knelt down in front of him and gently touched his side. He started to shake and he pulled away from me. I started freaking out and took pictures and sent them to FB asking for help. I called the vet and they couldn't fit him in until 4 p.m. It was 9 a.m. I found my dad at one of his C-stores and told him what happened to Sunny. He told me to watch him and try to get him fitted in the vet ASAP. When I got back home Sunny had defecated on my parents bedroom floor and he was in and out of 'sleep'. I called the vet again and told them that he really needed to be looked at. They told me the same thing. My neighbors came over after my brother was found crying outside. She assisted me and Michael in getting Sunny onto a blanket and then carried out to the back of the Sequoia and immediately went to the Vet. To make this part of the story shorter I pretty much forcefully made them look at Sunny and when they did they quickly took him inside and began to work on him. My brother and I didn't get to say good-bye. They told us they'd call. About 30 min after being home trying not to think of it the phone rang. Neither me or Michael raced to the phone, instead we stared at each other. After the 4th ring I answered it and I got a "I'm so sorry, but your dog didn't make it to surgery" that line haunts me still to this day. I just remember trying so hard to have a firm voice as I told her I would be by to pick him up. I hung up the phone and dropped to the floor in the fetal position and bawled. What came next was having to tell my brother because me crying didn't explain it very well...then we went to pick him up, and, I understand they do this to everyones dogs but WHY DO THEY PUT THEM IN GARBAGE BAGS...??? is it not enough that I lost my puppy but now youre going to put him in a garbage bag like, k, heres your garbage. so insensitive...or im just a complete baby. i had to call my sisters to let them know. we set sunny down in the shade by our tree in the backyard and carrie and laura made it up and we all sat by sunny until my dad got home. when my dad pulled up he had no idea sunny didnt make it until, well, he saw us and a garbage bag. He said nothing as he went to the shed and grabbed a shovel. Went to the pasture and began digging. No words, none. My brother then grabbed another shovel and assisted my dad. When it was ready Sunny was wrapped in a blanket. The princess one he always slept on (: afterwards we all sat outside and talked about Sunny and told stories and cried and then laughed.

No dog will ever replace Sunny. 3 of my sibling have a new dog and they are just as cute. But, they are not Sunny, they never will be. They will be new memories, new laughter, new love.

I <3 you Sunny!

C'est la vie.

So I have this friend. Who is not really my friend. 

That's the first line I read when I opened up my Facebook. That was a post from one of my best friends. I have to tell you...I can count my very best friends on one hand.. 3 fingers to be exact. And I guess after this post that makes just 2 fingers. 

Malena and I have been friends for years. We don't see each other every day like we used to and I thought that was OK. I mean, I only see Bubba (finger #1) like once a month IF I'M LUCKY!!! but, every time we finally get to hang out it's like we were never apart. Never have we ever needed to question our friendship....I mean, Bubba is a post on his own but our friendship is something that has always stayed the what changed with Malena..?

1- homegirl got married to a douche. Anyone who knows him will tell you that's all truth.. I mean, I tolerated him and sometimes I actually didn't dislike him..

2- they got divorced and I had to listen to hours of repeated drama...I gave advice but the problem was never fixed...over and over again. How do ppl live like that??

3- she had a baby with  him. mmhm and by then I hadn't seen/heard/talked to her in months. (meaning she didn't make an effort to talk to me either) I didn't say congrats.. Is that a thing? cuz if so I owe my entire family congratulation cards and a huge I’m sorry ha-ha 

Further into this novelized status, she says "I understand people get busy and grow apart but that’s no reason to completely shut me out of your life. I guess tomorrow this friend will find out if we're friends or not. Thanks for the memories <3 you". Right, sorry Malena I forgot the world only revolved around you. 

So, I guess I just have 2 finger friends. And I’m fine with it.. A friend (not a finger friend) from work is also friends on Facebook with Malena and asked me if it was about me. I giggled. I guess if the shoe fits it’s probably mine ha ha ha. 

With this I leave you,

                 Sorry I never called you back. I was just too busy doing everything that didn’t involve listening to you bitch for 2 hours, racking my minutes up (PS Care, that’s where all my minutes went...) I'm sorry that I stood in your wedding line dressed in leopard and hot pink so that you could get married to a douche. I’m sorry that I was the realest friend you had and told you frequently that you were just full of shit. 

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Birthdays and other shiz.

So, a massive update is in order. I had my birthday last month and I had this awesome idea for my blog post and then I got held up. When I finally had time I got sick. So. We'll enter the gory details now...

Story #1
This year I turned 22. HOLLA!! An all even number birthday. 😊 (anyone who knows me, this is a big deal). I was fortunate enough to get all weekend off from both jobs. Woop!! So, it's my birthday and I'll drink if I want to 😉🍻 Friday I hung out with the B-word. (Story update- read on) started drinking at my house and then when he mentioned food I jumped right on that! (We had a driver) 🚖 I stayed at his house (nothing happened so get your head where it belongs) Saturday morning I had his house to myself for a few hours. I woke up with the strong urge for some wata. Then I saw beer in the fridge. So, I did what any other 22 year old would do. I drank it all. Well, I didn't realize it was gone till, well, it was gone. Ben came home and annie was pretty drunk. (I didn't work all weekend so your judgments don't count.) to sum it up, I was drunk from a.m. To p.m. Went to the bar with my friends and dinner and then crashed my house party. Quick story... My roommate Amanda makes this drink everyone calls "Mandy juice" well. The bitch made me my own pitcher. Man, best roommate status. Everyone had a blast and got along. It was awesome. No drama 👌👍🙆 <--that's me jumping for joy haha 
Again, your Judgements are invalid. Aaand my Mandy juice is almost gone. 😁 

Sunday came and I remember why I don't get trashed. Ever. I couldn't find my phone. I wasn't wearing pants and I didn't know why everyone was sleeping in the hall. I've never been more confused. But, I made it to my bed. I'm pro. Cured my hangover with, yes, more alcohol. Took some meds and tried to be a productive member of society. Which brings me to my second story...

Story #2
Carrie and cam finally bought a house!! Took forever and felt like it was a very long wait for approval. But, their house is adorbs and they're happy so who currs?? 
I'm a champ and pat myself of the shoulder for being the best pillow carrier with the biggest hangover ever haha!! I'm also a great supervisor and pizza eater. Which helped my devil-ish headache. 
My dad is the best gramps
Cady-baby never had stairs till now. #BestFriendStatus

Then, to finish my weekend I visited baby duke/dukie/scooter and my sisters new-ish (new to me) apartment. 
This is how much he loves me. Wittle baby nephew 😂 

The end. 

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Drama Queen Novel....

I'm not exactly sure how to start this; but I really want to blog it because it is hilarious! 
it has been two years since my last dramatic encounter with someone i didn't care for. that means i have had two years of laughter, new friendships, and most importantly ME TIME! its been heaven really. i guess god decided i was done with the luxury life because just about a month ago i recieved a "casual" email on facebook from the B word. I wasnt very nice to him. im over it. Anyway, he ended up asking me if i would have a beer with him and i didnt hesitate to hurry and say i was just waaaayy too busy hahah (; 

a few weeks later, after i already forgot we talked i was at work having a blast at baby animal days and BAM another email. B-word: hey, still too busy for that beer?" damn, seriously? i decided "what the hell" i mean really how bad could it be. or, maybe im just trying to talk myself into it. ill let you decide. so, we planned a day. (yes, i planned it because remember im just waay too busy..) 

about an hour later, heres where it gets good guys, i get an email from a lovely red head. her name is drama. or, Kelsey Jane Lee. *insert giggle* 

 Hey this is bens girlfriend and he told me that he hit you up when we broke up for a few days but we've been back together for a few weeks now and for some reason I just need to make sure he's not still talking to his ex's. This is not me being a bitch this is just me making sure he's not lying to me. Please dont tell him I contacted you ill take care of it myself if it needs to be addressed but we live together but im out of town for a couple weeks and just want to make sure everything is good while im away. Again im not trying to be a crazy bitch just checking up on my boyfriend making sure he isn't slipping up again. I know you dont know me and I dont know you but it'd be really nice if you'd just keep this between us and not let him know. Thanks ahead of time!

Now, my good friend jaelise is friends with the B-word. so, she told me about what happened. this girl, this girl be CRAAAAYYYY. quick fill-in: they broke up, got back together. broke up, (contacted me), got back together, broke up AGAIN (3rd times the charm) cops involved. she moves out (to my knowledge). apparently she cannot accept it. poor girl. also, if your gonna sniff out a girl on FB dont say "not trying to be a bitch" uh, yeah you are you dumb bitch...i never say "not trying to be a bitch but..." i just say it like it is because thats my opinion on something and if i hurt your feelings then plug your ears (: anyway, enough about me. heres what i responded with..

If you have to worry about if he's being faithful then you should probably be with someone you can trust. Also, I have no intentions of doing anything with him. He did ask me for a beer but honestly I don't think it's a big deal. Y'all need to figure your Shiz out. Someone's not on the right page. He hurt me too dude.

although i was filled with rage, i TRIED to stay as calm as i could. here's my logic, and i feel like i expressed it in my response. i posted on facebook also. You are in a relationship for many moons. the relationship turns sour. you try and fix it. nothing helps. youre not married, you dont have kids..whats keepin ya?? to me, it does not matter if you live together or not. when its over, pack up your shit! yeah, it blows and it is heartbreaking. but, if you two have decided its not working...its probably not working. dont pretend youre still together...dont fish out all the girls that your "boyfriend" talks to..romantic or not, its annoying. i now dont have a quiet life. so fuck you kelsey jane. (fuckin stupid name)  dont worry, there's more..

Im just nervous. Its not that I dont trust him I just found out some stuff he'd been keeping from me and I just want to make sure he's back on the right page. What happened between you and him if you dont mind me asking? I dont want to get too personal its just we never really talked about it he told me about his other ex's but not really about what happened between you two.

Probably because its none of your damn business you dumb dumb!! dont go behind your "boyfriends" back and try to pry information out of me and then fuckin "casually" try to get personal. yo, we aint that close.

It's not a big deal. And I don't talk about my personals with those I don't know. Do you just not like him talking to girls?

I didnt really want to know. but hey, i guess i got time to see what i can squeeze out of YOU (:

I dont care if he talks to girls and if you two are just friends then its all fine I dont care I just wanted to make sure that he wasn't keeping anything from me. We've had a rough last month and just wanna make sure he wasn't slipping up. I dont care who he's friends with as long as he's faithful to me. So you answered my question if you say its no big deal then its not. And no problem sorry I didnt mean to offend you by asking you.

Liar. now, im done. this girl is what 18? 19? i call jae, apparently im really not the only one she sniffed out.. although, the message to jae was a lot more kitty claws. so, why was she kissing my ass??? I hope shes just scared of me haha. i guess jae showed ben the, i did the same. remember, im not nice. but i try...sometimes..

Yo, you need to check your girl or be on the same damn page. Cuz home girl sniffed me out on FB going out of 
her way to make sure nothings going on between us. You got a cray one. Good pick.

now, i dont regret that message. i both laughed and felt great after sending it! i showed him the messages and his reply...

Holy novel...Fuck. sorry... I'm a single man, we don't live together. But I ain't gonna bring drama shit to nobody..

well, thank you ben, thats very nice of you. 

so there you have it folks. drama does still exist. even when youre in hiding. brace yourselves..youre probably next...DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNN

p.s. ill ignore all the errors if you will (;

The end.

Sunday, February 23, 2014


my parents are the funniest parents in the whole world!

my conversation with my dad:
dad- "this girl came into smiths yesterday wearing these prescribed glasses you could probably get at a clown carnival".
me- "did ya?"
dad- "and her boyfriends glasses weren't much smaller...but, standing next to her they looked normal."
me- "hahaha i wish i could have seen that"
dad- "i wish i didn't. it was a freak show."

my conversation with my mom:
me: "have you tried the new flatizza?"
mom: "no, i ha- *excessive laughter* i made a funny"!
me: "you can only tell me if it's actually funny"
mom: "does it make your tits flat? get it? flatTIZa!"
me: *attempting to add to the joke*
mom: "i want a shirt that says does this make my boobs look big?"
(my mom had breast cancer and is now boobless. that's why this is funny)

some people take their parents for granted. they dont take the extra two seconds during a phone call to say "i love you". i dont have mushy parents that say "i love you" or give embracing hugs EVERY. TIME. THEY. SEE. YOU. but, when they do say "i love you" it makes a really big impact.

I don't live with my parents so they "i love you's" are more frequent. i have no idea what i would do without my sarcastic, dorky parents. (:

.and that is all.

Thursday, January 30, 2014

P.M.S is an actual thing..

Today we are going to talk about periods and it's horrible side effects. So, with that..I learned this week that I have never p.m.s'ed. like ever...maybe i'm lying but this week was sheer HELL.

I started my period a couple days ago and rolled my eyes and grabbed a tampon with no "thank you's" to our lovely mother nature. apparently she didn't like me this month because the next few days were aweful. You always hear stories about girls that are evil during their cycles, emotional girls, or girls that are the same as they were last week, happy. I used to be the last story. 

by the end of the second day of my period, i was bawling. i literally thought that i was dying. i have never been in so much pain in my life. AND to make it better i was at work. now, i work in a group home with all ladies. and i was the only one on their cycle. weird right?  looks like they might get a better month than me. (i had enough pain for 40) I legit had cramps for over 3 hours, took a midol 30 min before the pain started like they say so that i didnt have to suffer horribly (no diff from what i always do). no, it still came. i called my mom bawling and she said to take another one if it didnt stop soon..fuuuuu. well, i can assure you the pain was still there. so, i took 2 exedrine menstral pills an hour later and even that did nothing. i finally got to go home.

i laid down, i put random hot shit on my stomach, i rubbed my stomach, i drank sprite, i even prayed for forgiveness. nothing. the universe must have been listening when i laughed at my older sister a couple years ago for crying over her cramps. sorry beth. i super take it back.

the next day i woke up and right when i did i was in such a crabby mood. said 2 words to my roommate. didn't pet cute little penny, ate breakfast and was rude the whole day. work blew, i was with 2 new staff and a difficult client from the home. by the end of my shift i was so frustrated that i cried all night. same thing the next day. only i probably said 3 more words. work went by really smooth but i was so glad to get off and go home. i showered for 2 hours and most of it i just stood there. 

then today came. there was no clear sky, no sun, no warm weather. but, no more blood and i was like all of a sudden like myself. i joked around at work and had a great time chatting with regular customers i didn't have a damn thing to complain about. 

so, i would say this is my first week ever pms-ing. i've never felt like that ever. i always go about my days as usual and have a little pain here and there but easily redirected with meds. i hope this was karma for making fun of my sister (LOL oops) because if i have to be a regular with this i'd rather chop my head off. 

Monday, January 13, 2014

thinking is never a good thing..

This weekend has been a eye opener. I learned some things on Friday from my roommate. Turns out she may or may not be staying in logan. She is also my landlord. When I hear news i tend to let my mind run wild with "what if's" then i'm just fucked.

Today i was at work sweeping the floor and i about had a panic attack. out of no where i started thinking...what if she doesn't stay? Am i gonna have to move? Do i go back home? My parents barely have enough room for my nieces where do i sleep? where do i put all my shit? Am i gonna live in my truck again? Do i put money away? Do i have enough time to save money? I ended up sitting on a chair at a table and just took some deep breaths and counted to 20.

I still haven't found a solution to my "what if's" but, my dad has the day off tomorrow and he has answers for everything. I just hope he doesnt say "just come home" blek.

I'm so grateful for my family. I have to say that having a large family benefits big time. No way in hell will i have as many kids as my mom had (i dont want any) but i'm glad we are all best of friends. sometimes. (; My sisters are bitches but they have my back no matter what happens. i'm mostly thankful for carrie, she's obviously my favie. (shh) she knows everything about me and i'm her shadow. I talked to her tonight for like 10 min and just in that 10 min i found more clarity than i have all weekend. she knows when i'm freakin out and knows how to say things so i will understand. <3 maybe if i have to move ill just squeeze on into her house ha ha. seriously though.

p.s. this quote is perf.