Chapter 5. Primary nurses

I came in the next morning and was feeling a little more comfortable navigating through the NICU. I had grabbed a coffee and went to bed space 33. This is where I met Janet. Her hair was up in a high bun and bangs in her face. She spoke confidently and explained what she was doing and why she was doing them. I instantly loved her.

Wednesday's are for parent hour. She handed me a flyer and invited me to go telling me how much fun I would have meeting other parents with NICU babes. My social anxiety began to well and I really didn't want to go but felt bad denying the offer so I happily said "yeah for sure!" Why do I do that? "Even if it sucks at least you get free lunch out of it." Can't deny that truth. I went to parent hour and actually did enjoy it. It was a conference room setting and there were a few parents who also looked very unexcited to be there. We went around the room and introduced ourselves and told our NICU experience. There were a few parents who had had their babies early summer and were still in the NICU. Some who have had multiple surgeries. Some who had left and had to come back. I told my story rather quickly, I talk rapid when I'm nervous. After, I was stopped by a mom who told me her niece had the same condition as my Leila and though her story was sadder than mine, it gave me hope for Leila's future.

Throughout the day I talked to Janet about my life and got to know her fairly well. She asked if she could be a primary nurse and I was puzzled. To help keep things as consistent with cares they offer primary nurses who will work with the same babies. I agreed and she filled out the paperwork and instantly we became family. That evening during shift change I met another nurse who would soon become LeiLani's next primary. Amy is the nurse that cares about small detail. She takes the time to pick out the cutest linens in the basket that match. She puts bows in babies hair and teaches the parents how to do cares for their baby. I got to help with giving Leila a bed bath. It was extremely difficult having to navigate through the cords and tubes hooked everywhere. I was still nervous about the equipment and didn't want to bump a single thing. Later, I would learn these things weren't so scary. Amy became our primary after I had talked to Janet the next week about how much I loved her. We agreed I should talk to her when she came in that night. Amy walked in the door and Janet says "so me and Annie think you should be a primary because we love you." I'll never forget the look on Amy's face when I said "please".

Both of these ladies have become a part of my family. Beth comes to see Leila a few times a week and has gotten to know both Janet and Amy well. My mom adores them and I feel safe leaving each night knowing they are with her. Once you're accepted into my family you're there for life. Hopefully they're ready to come to parties ha ha!